คุณ.

You.

It's always you all this while. Savannah.

Funny how things changed from 2 years ago. 2007 seemed so long ago. I actually looked back at my thoughts and how my life was 2 years ago. Reading back those ups and downs in life. My blogs, pictures and notes taken over the years. I did have a good life, too bad, I wasn't bright to realise that then. Sometimes things just flow past you as you watch life runs through. Hey, just a random thought. According to Tom Hanson from (500) days of summer, he thinks he can only find true happiness when he's in love. So, it makes me wonder too. I'm not desperate. It's just that I'm looking for happiness. Maybe it's love, maybe it's not. I really don't know. I guess only by living life, we can only find out what's going to happen next. I just want to see where life is bringing me next. Maybe a home coming trip can let me find happiness again. I'll see you pretty soon.

Missed up,

Ang Mo Kia

~listening to Relient K's Savannah~

Henri Poincaré, "If God speaks to man, he undoubtedly uses the language of mathematics."

boring

hey everyone, its quite some time since i haven't blog. So than i will share my experience i did the whole month in December. So now i had finished my studies, treakathon race( got the 4th placing) and now the only thing left is working in KFc genting Klang. hahaha. Anyway the work is boring and routine as they all want to cut the operation cost and optimizes the manpower. Thus they changed my department very often, from costumer services to cook and now back-up. Quite boring Work as i think its solely based on energy usage with ought knowledge applied. Thus i planed to quite this job by the end of this month or maybe by the end of next month.BTW congrats to Hanjun as he got a job, i hope the job will give you more experience and let you learn something. And know what? I care for you man!!! If you come home, lets meet =)

finished my physics lab4 long time ago and i guess i only learn maybe 60% of it??? as i realize that i can't really juggle between work and studies togather. hehe. recently i had met with this girl name Qian which i know during my work last year and guest wat, she had a bf ady, and she admitted to me. So then i din't went out with her as i dont think its appropriate to be so close with someone who is not available. Rite? it may promote misundestanding, hahah. then she asked me weather am I interested in her sister who is about 2 years elder then me. And i said yes withought much thinking as i ment yes as a friend because i don't really know her yet. Anyway, i dont think its possible as then she is less educated and not that suitable in many terms such as lifestyle and other. hehe so i guess i will ignore her.

I posted some pictures of me winning the UTAR treakathon ady. So you all could check it out at my profile =) and also i had a hair cut by my mother as its cost Rm 10 to cut out there. So advance new year wish friends!!! hope you all have a good year ahead. Going work tomorrow =)

Dr chang,
When you appreciate life, its gets more meaningful =)

Home coming.

I have been working lately. Quite busy in the morning, considering having to wake up like 4 or 5 am to get to work. Sometimes it is really tiring. Had a trip down to Noarlunga, which is like an hour drive away. I woke up at half past 5 for that. Thank God for the day off today and tomorrow. Factory work on the monday morning.

After Christmas, I might be sent to Broken Hill to work up in the mines. Before that, I might be going home. Yeah, that's it. I'm going home. After a long 8 months here, I'm going home. I'm now just waiting for the tickets. It would just for a while, so I might only be visiting those who still even bother to meet me. I would love to see all my mates but I just got a feeling, some of them don't even care about me anymore. So, why should I waste my time? I might meet up with Eujin, Lawrence, Yihao, Kathir, G(So sorry that your girl was sick and couldn't say good bye to you while I was in Melbourne), Akil, Nadrah(if she wants to go out with me), Geetha, Aaron, Laila and some of those MRSM dickheads.Who, who?

By the way, don't ever let me hear you say that Indians, Malays or any Indigenous race being a cheap race. Trust me, I'll punch you. Little do you know, my maternal grandfather's family are native Siamese. Are you trying to say that I'm a descendent of a cheap race? I'm so surprised how your close mind shaped the way you see the world. I have a zero tolerance policy for racism and any type of prejudice.

Recently, I was really screwed up by some of the people I know. It kinda serve as a wake up call for me when I try to keep friends as much as I can. Maybe it's the guy from the top, letting me know that some people are just not worth it and it's time to move on. But, as usual, there are those who are always in my mind. Friends are hard to keep, let alone female friends. Or some of you might call girl friends, read the fine prints, not girlfriends. After making Geetha a bit happy for her b'day and took Laila out for Oyster that night, I realise how sometimes people overrate the idea of being in a relationship. Bullshit love story. I would rather hang out with these people that I call friends. Back to the topic, it was awesome. Some pictures, maybe?

Mussels in Belgian Bar.

Guess who sent that?

post - script : I really don't wanna lose those back home but you're giving me no choice.

From,

Ang Mo Kia

~listening to Mumm-Ra's Starlight~

I'm coming home.

Wounds.

Kathir told me once, we must let go of the past in order to move on and seek true happiness. Too bad, I didn't realise how my life was moving on yet somehow moving towards me then. I won't be screaming on the roof about the life I'm having right now. I mean, to be clear, it's not perfect. Yeah, I might be living some people's dream. Life on the turbo lane, a late night drink on Rundle while living a life without any limitation. The past month has been like that but you can never underestimate the power of walking alone. Someone came up to me and told about how he/she has never been single for more than 2 weeks. Of course, I was shocked about how he/she would share such a thing with me, considering we just met. I guess maybe I grew up from constantly needing someone by my side. Of course, being in love may be overrated. People always seem to be happier when they're in love but have you ever seen them when they're not. Question yourself on the urge of always finding someone to be by your side. The fact remains for those who can never be lonely, they always have the need to have physical company. You might argue that I'm being bias considering how I never stand a chance going out on a date, let alone find someone to be in a relationship with. I guess, it's a little bit of destiny and a pinch of coincident that I'm where I am. To those who knows the Almighty lord might say this is His plan while those of you that don't, maybe it's just magical power and fairy dust that makes this world goes round.

Tearing up an old wound after looking pictures of failed past relationship doesn't help, even myself. Being young and naive, I do sometimes find myself in a dilemma of finding happiness. For some, happiness can only happen when you find the true love of your life. Is that so? Frankly, I don't really believe true love and all those mushy mushy feelings. I don't know, maybe because I was disappointed, maybe I haven't really seen or feel it or maybe I'm just being ignorant. Every now and then, people with heart breaking stories make my list of "I should call them and help them out", but it's really difficult to convince people that time can heal all sort of pain. I've been there and done that. Then, no one could console me. In fact, most of them gave up and mock my incapability in putting my feet back on the ground. Everything changed when I met Kathir and how he single handedly changed my life. No, save my life.

Dear Doc, I don't mean to be so rude to you. I just want to let you know, in life, there are some people that you can be there for them but there are some who're just not worth it. If anyone is reading this, I haven't get in contact with any of my Utar mates for a long time. I have no idea what happened to them but I guess I cannot expect them to try to contact them like how I try my best always to keep in touch with them. Doc, don't expect anything from a friend, especially just because she's a she and you hope something can happen. People can deny this all they want but in my opinion, there are so many things in life that are more important than "pikat pompuan". I know, I suck at it because maybe I just don't put my mind into it. Or I could very well be someone's bitch. In life, you need to choose what to keep and what to throw away especially when it's not worth it anymore. I really hope you get what I mean.

Akil once told me, that best thing a person can get used to getting used to being lonely. No offense to Liverpool but sometimes I must learn to walk alone. I'm not trying to point out that I would ditch all my friends and walk this road alone but I think I should get used to the fact that others have their own plans. We should not be clinging on others and wishing others to inject happiness into our life. Some of us, after having too many friends, suddenly not having to switch back to ourselves once the friends are gone. It's really sad. I try to put myself alone as a default and having friends and possibly a relationship as a bonus or should I say reward for being nice. That way, I will appreciate them more, knowing that they are gifts from the Man above. It's a simple concept but complicated application, I hope you try to understand what I'm saying and think about it.

I'm going to work next week. I'll give you a call before I leave. Take care. I hope to see you soon. Really soon.

Truly, Madly, Deeply,

Ang mo kia.

~listening to Maroon 5's Goodnight Goodnight~

i am tired

Hey i guess only hanjun is the only one who really wants to know what i am blogging cause others aren't that close to me =) Erm i had just deleated the girl taht i said i was interested in my previous blog. Because i am a very practical person and if you dont give me a chance to meet you even't after 2years knowing you on9 then its batter to end our connection, Rite? there's no point to be so deaparate and feeling jealious about her everytime I see her with other guys. Its batter that i find a good friend myself. so thats it girl, i am no fool who is an apparatus to give you nice sweety words just to get your attention. Byee... its batter that i dont know you at first. waisted my time =)

Dr chang

I and the 6km race

hey there friends, especially Hanjun Tan. I ran the 6km UTAR treakathon and got the 4th placing. It was kinda tough race as the running road was at the hill and the students that leaded in front of me was really fast and i didn't get to cut them. They leaded me and keep the pace constant between me. Btw it can also be said that i actually will be the maybe 6 or 7 placing if several leading runners didn't slow down at the ending round. Haha. They gave me chances to overtake them. Btw the winner of this race which is from Kampar said he din't event train for the event. While i toke 2 weeks working leave just to win this event. Hahah at least i got the 3rd runner up. With ought any medal but they gave me a cert. I will upload several pictures which is taken by my fiend chun hui as he came to the race just to take pictures( its his interest). I really worked hard for the race, and was abit disappointed when i know i got the 4th position.I will upload soon in my facebook after taking the pictures from my friend tomorrow.

Talking about love life( i know it sucks hanjun!) i think that some things are fated.The girl that i was admiring who is in KL, went to Midvalley on the 21st and i was also there with my parents. But then we dint meet as i toughs she was in Port Diction. Anyway life is like this, rite if its fated then its fated if not then maybe its god who think we aren't suitabe and so we din meet. Haha hanjun that's why i think its batter to be single in a way we have more freedom. I actually planned to find a partner after i pass last semester. But haven't found anyone sutable. The girl that i mentioned above is just a far distance partner that i know thru a friend thru friendster and msn for 2 years ady. But we havent meet before though i asked her out as maybe she's not used to me.So i think its batter to leave it alone and stop beeing desperate on the net=). Actually in real life i could say that there are also several people who shows interest in me, But i cant interact much with them as i am a banana. U see? I think my looks ae also not bad too and a close friend of myne said who got me as her partner will be lucky as i am a very hardworking person... he asid: Did you see any Chinese guy who could work from 10am to 10pm in KFC and get the salary of RM1900? thus he said i am very hardworking. I agree in that sence. So i think maybe i would like to be single till i graduate if its not fated to be =).

will be uploading the pictures soon as i know some of you wanted to see them. Going to work soon in KFC's cook department, its not a hard job but quite boring and lifeless. Hope to change to costumer services department as i could maybe play with Little kids of at least talk to costumers when its board =)
~Dr chang~ special people are attracted to their same kind

(600) days of mining in New York.

In Malaysia, it's always hot. I think it's summer everyday. I used to remember questioning my mother about the real meaning behind Chinese festivals such as Chinese New Year and the Winter Solstice Festival. I wonder, why would people back in China take it seriously. Before I left for Australia, I had a long talk with my grandparents about their expectation and I personally asked for their blessing as I followed my father's footstep down under. I finally got what my grandfather meant when he said, he used to suffer in cold and hunger during the long winter of China. I guess we're pretty lucky being in Malaysia where my forefather seek for a more comfortable life.

I finally moved out of Mawson Lakes. I'm currently living with Luung in Magill. Not bad actually. It's been a week and I still cannot get myself back in shape ready for exams. Oh my God! The weather played a role too in melting my brain and lowering my sperm count. It's 40 degrees celsius. Can you believe that?

A few nights ago, after scoring 2 goals during training (as usual, one's for you and another's for you, birthday girl), I decided to cut David a break by volunteering to be goalkeeper for a while. I played quite well, not trying to brag, but to be honest, we have 3 goalkeepers and 2 of them are utterly complete fools with no football sense. So, relative to them, I'm quite ok, I guess. Heuy is still the best no doubt but I think my coach wants 2 keepers. Me, trying my best when I can, was offered to play keeper for the Parafield competition next season. "Tan, I want you to consider playing goalie for us next season, I think you're a good keeper, you can throw very well", Hugo said. Oh no, I've been trying to hide my goalkeeping skills from my mates because I don't want to play keeper. Come on, I want to score! No one remembers the keeper, people only remember the scorer. Maybe I might consider, who knows?

Recently, I watched (500) days of summer. It's a very sweet show. Boy meets girl, boys fall in love but girl doesn't. That show is kinda self relating in such a way that I see myself in that guy and how much I wish for things to happen differently. Tom is a guy that thinks that he only can find true happiness when he finds his true love while Summer doesn't believe in true love after her parents split. Tom fell in love with Summer but after dating for almost a year, Summer broke up with him and he just lost himself. Finally, she met him again and just when Tom thought that they are getting back together, she told him, she's engaged. Being even more heart broken, he fell into a depressed state and after months, he finally got back on his feet and before the movie ended, he met a girl called Autumn. Funny how I see myself in that show and how happy I am that I finally got past it.

Zooey Deschanel is so pretty in that movie. I think I'm seriously in love with her. LOL. I think you kinda looked like her.

It's either you or the hot weather,

Ang Mo Kia

~I'm listening to Quietdrive's Jessica~

The 100th post

How are you going?

Busy weeks now and ahead. Unbelievable. I feel bad having to leave out this blog and in fact, I'm happy that I see Doc (all the best for you run) updating the blog. I think I would try my best to at least update this blog once a month unless I'm stuck in the middle of no where. Can't believe he is actually one of the most active writers here. The owner of the blog is no where to be seen.

I have something going on in my mind. It's about the Chinese dudes from Malaysia in my college here. I'm not judging them but a mere observation. Somehow, we're so closed minded when it comes to studying, socializing and most of all, living our usual life. I'm saying this because I'm really upset seeing my kin not being able to leave the bubble we all are so comfortable being in. Truthfully, I'm not sure about what I'm saying here. Maybe I'm right, maybe I'm wrong. Who knows? It's just you and me.

Recently, something happens, for a reason, apparently.
Firstly, as we all know, Chelsea went back top of the table. Somehow I doubt united has the power this year after selling Pondaldo. *Cheers*

Secondly, my major project is bound to enter the epic fail books of record. *nice*
Thirdly, that other day, I went to an interview. I walked from the bust stop to the office. It was like a 20 minutes walk under the hot scorching sun in my beautiful suit. Then, I was attacked by a dog. For a moment, I thought I was going to die. As you can see, I'm still pretty much alive to write this. *So screwed*
Fourthly, on my way back, I saw this Vietnamese chick on the bus (I know she's vietnamese because the office is located in a vietnamese people area, Hanson Road) and I got a shock of my life when I realised she looks like my previous course mate and another girl I've met from paintball and they are all Vietnamese too. Is this a kind of a sick joke? Am I being paranoid or are they stalking me? *Weird*
Fifthly, last week, after weeks of goal draught, I finally got myself on the score sheet. A beauty I would say and another simple tap in. One's for my future shrink and another's for that song offering. *mysterious, ain't it?*

Sneak peak ahead: I'm moving out to Magill. I think.

p/s it's Norman's birthday. Please do drop a comment wishing him.

As usual,

Ang Mo Kia.

~I'm listening to Keane's Better than this.~

short semister in UTAR

Hie there everyone, its been quite a long time since i din blog out in our shard blog. Haha. Erm actually i really have tons and tons of things that i could actually talk about. lets start with my short sem. Yeap this comming 3 monts will be my short sem. As then I will be taking lab4 and maths. But after further consideration I dropped Maths due to a very packed teaching period that is 7 weeks in my short sem.

So this 3 month what will i be doing huh?
1) Taking physics laboratory 4: This will be my last lab with my lecturer Dr Chew Kerlit(2 labs in one week, thus 2 reports in 1 week, hatic rite).She a totally intelligent lecture specializing in semiconductors field. I got B- last sem in her class. Btw, sometimes i really envy these type of people who is so good in academic and some often i will be thinking that i am not these type of people who will get a 1st class or event 2nd class upper in my degree period. Sobs =.= i am not the study type of person. Anyway, life goes on and i will be having lab every Tuesday and Thursday. Erm, today was my 1st lab session and i really feel so happy when i could get to touch the apparatus and laboratory equipment.AHAHA erm must really use all these as DR Chew said that it would be hard to use or event touch these things in companies.

2) I will be working at my old working place KFC genting Klang every Thursday to Sunday form 4pm to 1am. Thus its an 8 hours work, the same thing everyday. Customer Service Crew (CSC). Eeeh, BTW that day while i was working i saw a very pretty girl with her parents. She is so cute and loving. But some how the father is like moody. I smiled to her and she smile to me. Why did i said that she's loving? because she hugs her father and kisses her mother spontaniously. OMG i hope one day i will have a beautiful girl like this. I would die for that. Erm maybe in 10 more years to go yea. hhaha. Hope all of you reading my post will also have a loving life.

3) I will be participating in UTAR's Trekathon(6km) on 22/11 and i aim to be the top 3 winners. Thus i am really aiming and working out hard for this event. Really!!! i event run about 6km just now with the time of 38 min. I must improve my timing and aim below 35mins. But then i will be working+ Studying before the event, Thus have less time to run in, as i will have only 3 days holiday. I must really plan well before the event =). Hey Hanjun I will post my medal and Cert if i win the race. YOU WAIT AND SEE.

To all my friends, I believe that is you work hard for something and the results fails, you may not getting 100% out of your hard work but at least 40% out of it.
HAVE a GOOD NITE

~DR Chang

Secrets in Carrefour bukit jalil...

There are 2 things I wanna share with my fellow buddies...

1st
on 4th october, I discovered something special about this complex where chronus Yuen Wei is staying one la... In the complex there are plenty of foot massage and reflexology center. And there are also CHICKENS, u can find there, so for ppl like Chris, pls do VISIT there, very cheap nia.. the look still ok la... haha

2nd
Come to the main point, I went to a comic shop, and saw a girl tat suits my taste... she is above average, and she likes comics... then I went into the shop and ask for Shakugan No Shana, even though i din bring my wallet bcz i was out with parents... then the tauke dono where is the comic, and tat girl immediately took it out and gave the tauke... however, the girl is jus a customer lo... she has a special scent, not really scent la... something that attracted me... and when she passed me tat book, she's like smile at me... lucky tat time my hair is 'yeng' type la... I was like kena electric shock from her... she wears oso nice too... now i still remembered her face...

God gave me a chance, but I din appreciate... I shud have take her contact right? or make some easy discussion about anime... haiz... but since she knows so well where is the comic book located, then she must be a customer who always visit tat shop... but bukit jalil is far from my home...

hope i can have another chance to meet her lo... God can give me 2nd chance?

What is love

dear friends, it have been maybe about 2 weeks i dint blog. This is maybe due to the finals that is approching(U all will understand if ur a UTARian).



Erm, let me start with my exam experience,

i had been taking 2 papers which is Electricity and magnetism(E&M) while another one is Wave and Oscillation. I did study the whole 2 weeks b4 exam to prepare for E&M cos its more complicated and looks harder for us. In the end that 1st paper came out to be quite easy but for the other one is so damn tough. I think i failed that paper, the lecture dint event give any clues about whats going to come out while the exam questions have only 20% of the tutorials questions.... A bit disappointed. I think i may fail that paper.or maybe get the highest with a D.
So after that paper which is on the 14th i dint event touch a single book as i don't event have the mood to do so till today when i started studying.I must get an A for the next paper or else i will really be in the second probation and can say BYE BYE to my PTPTN.

Lately i felt that humans needs love no mater who they are and how their attitude is.erm, if ur thinking i am talking crap, then ignore me pls....maybe i am beginning to become a loner.. i think,

~chang

sienz...

wahlaoeh, now feel extremely bored after reading structural analysis... now i really screwed up my life... fml.. really fml, structural cant get A liao... its supre hard to aim for that target....

envy lai cz he is our highest scorer, while im the score balancer for CIY2S2, who really drag down the growth... sienz... but i don feel guilty anyway... MUAHAHAHA.... also, im kinda get the shock in my life, when i realize Wan Shing is in Dean List.... cz maybe she got study ba....


Now really wan study... surely will.... try get A- or B+ for structural with coursework mark of 50s... over 100.........

hungry?

i am blogging at 4am now.
i was studying till 2am, then i watched TV till 3am, suddenly it rains heavily here. I tried to sleep but suddenly felt that my head is aching and still cant be asleep.I keep on wondering why i am having head pain and can't sleep. So then i make some nestum drink and felt batter. Never toughed that its because of the hunger in my stomach. Felt so good after eating something. But then i suddenly toughed about; I could easily get food in the cold rainy night. What about others in other part of the world? And why aren't some people in this modern world not satisfy with their life?

Maybe its because that human won't be satisfy with what they had if they haven't gone thru any hardnesship. So friends, be happy of what u have.

DR Chang

Racism

Hey everyone, it had been quite some time since i stop blogging due to finishing all my coursework as final is approaching. So here i come.

Recently i was so busy preparing for my exams and other academic stuff. U know what? there are some people who are my classmate which are so bad in attitude.Its batter that i don't disclose more detail.. just that they are so selfish and their attitude cant be change anymore... u see.

Sometimes when sadness brings you down its up to our self to take the own initiatives to solve the problem.Don't just turn around the bush and blame others for your misery as it wont bring you anyware.And if the problem cant really be solve no mater how hard you had tried, just leave it as it is. this is what i wold like to say to everyone who are having difficulties in any aspects( Relationship,studies,family, surrounding and other more).

To Hanjun, i saw ur blog and felt quite sad about how they treat foreigners there.Man... what can i say? actually no country in this world can avoid racism u know. But at least here in Malaysia we wont point a finger towards a foreigner( Indonesian,Bengali or event other race) they are really rude. Erm maybe in my own opinion, racism occurs because we aren't living with other race and thus the locals will be feeling insecure when another race comes in your country and inhabit it.. u know what i mean? For example, u know when the Chinese and Indians came to Malaysia, they were regarded as slaves to the locals and we are also describe as low-class people who will do anyting to survive.But in the end after 50+ years of integration we know each other more and be more tolerant to each other.

Some people are hard to be change no mater what we do to them to make this world a batter place. But then they still wont get what ur trying to do and still stick to their own taught in a nutshell.This happens especially to racist people as they taught other race are trying to harm them.In conclusion. JUST IGNORE THEM.
~they pray to god 24 hours a day
~they do whatever which is preached
~they do charity
~they go for Sunday services
but in the end they just discriminate other race.

ps: take care hanjun some people cant be changed and they will only understand if they are in your shoes.

- i am running daily of about 5km every afternoon... Haha, i think i will be very thin in a short moment.That's for sure.

-having the last assignment before i will end all my coursework for year2 semester 1

-erm... somehow i just tough about doing voluntary services with St John Ambulance. Miss the time when i can contribute to the society and also help people and loves ones who are in suffering

-need to study continuously this week till 28th of this month

-cut my hair

Take care:
DR Chang( some call me brother chang in the class)

The way the world see us.

I wrote this because sometimes when I walk along Salisbury Highway, I tend to get the finger from locals driving past. Sometimes, in restaurants, the waitress loses her smile everytime she sees an Asian costumer. Months ago, attacks on Asian students was in the news every now and then. If you already hate me when you read my introduction, I suggest you to scroll down to the very bolded end.

Sometimes when I talk to my coursemates, coming from all parts of Asia, I'm just curious on how they see the world. The thing is, the way we see the world eventually correlate to the way the world see us. Us being asians. I cannot stop but wonder, how the Australians see us being people of a different skin color, different culture and different language. Special cheers to Daniel and Thomas for being so nice when the world seems to mean. I always try my best to be as polite as possible, not only just when I'm here. Even back in my country, where the racial tension is reasonably stressed. In malaysia, Chinese has a reputation of being racist. Yes, I fully vouch for that. In my years in college, I've seen verbal abuse from my kin to the our fellow countrymen. After seeing the beauty of mutual respect and tolerance in high school, I know how stupid it would be to hold grudge to a particular group of people and how wonderful it would be if we can love and respect each other. Rather than pointing out our difference, we should embrace our similarity.

I speak for my own colour, truthfully, Chinese people also is known for being cheap(Thrifty is alright, being cheap is really ugly), arrogant, proud, judgmental and cunning. This is not just how our counterpart in Malaysia see us, this is how the world see us. In my opinion, Chinese people keep on thinking that they are superior which lead to arrogance and from our rich and strong history, we know that's why we get fucked. After befriending mainland Chinese students, I kinda realised a lot from them but I try not to judge. Ever wonder why foreigners, be it, Japanese, Caucasians, Arabians or Indians despises us. Honestly, I know by pointing out our undesirable attitude won't do any good. That's why my father heavily insist on teaching and educating our family on how to respect and love. I guess he learned that during his day in Christchurch.

Deep down, I know we Chinese people can do better than that. No doubt, Chinese people are better in math and mass production but instead of boasting, we should learn how to be gracious. Slowly, we can change. History is our best teacher. Remember the opium war? Remember Marco Polo's visit? Remember the oppression of the 8 alliance and how China was beaten to the ground? History never fails. We should always learn from our mistake. I plead all Chinese people in the world to never stop loving, never judge people but accept them for they are, keep on giving rather than taking, never stop helping and be polite. I guess if we start now, generation after generation, time after time, evolution after revolution, maybe the world see us differently.

*I would wish to dedicate this to an event that made me realised how we see the world. During last CNY, I overheard my grandmother saying to the younger cousin, "If you're naughty, I'll ask an Indian to come kidnap you." Of course, she used some really "not so polite" word instead of Indian (I think you know what I mean). It's a fucking disgrace considering my best friend is an Indian whom I consider as my family. It really really upsets me.
**Besides that, back in college, I overheard how some people make fun of other races, stereotyping them and cursing them in mandarin. To those assholes, if that's how you see other people, that's how Australians sees us. Because of people like you, we are known as a bunch of racist.

post - script : For kathir, they say, we're like brothers with a different color.

Missing you,

A yellow Ang Mo Kia



If you're reading this, means you hate me. The truth is, sometimes I revolt due to boredom and random eccentricity. Either I'm paranoid, insane or just crazy about you.

Parted-love by chris tham

Never let parted to be a solution,

there's gotta be another way.

Never put yourself in a dead position,

tomorrow will always be another beautiful day.

All the chances that have passed me by,

would it matter if i've given it one more try?

The freedom that we seek.

Ever wonder where we come from? Any questions? Yeah. Complicated and complex questions like the origin of earth and the solar system, the mystery of the universe and the big bang theory. Down to simple questions asked when you're found drunk along the sidewalk of Hidley Street like "where are you from?", "what's your name?" or "can you even walk or should I get you a cab?". No matter what, some of us ponder on the origin of our life or just our very existence. I sometimes do think about the past. People say, history is our teacher. I wonder by digging into my past, what would I find? My story or theirs? Maybe a bit of both. Every step my forefathers made lead me to this path.

When I was kid, I always wanted to see the world. Don't get me wrong, I still pretty much want to do that but I question my purpose now. I wonder what will it be like if I would stay back in Australia after graduating, provided if I ever get residency. I like it here, it's beautiful. After befriending students from China, the land of my forefathers. For your information, my paternal grandfather came from Shantou, somewhere relatively close to Hong Kong. My maternal grandfather's ancestry tracks back to Thailand. Yet, I consider myself pretty much a full blood Chinese Malaysian.

Back to my point, knowing these mainland Chinese made me realised how different my life and thoughts are from them although we're just 2 generations away. I was even considered an outcast back in college because I was weird but I don't deny it. Yes, I'm a bit weird or different. The Chinese living in Malaysia has a different lifestyle compared to those from living in China. I believe the overseas Chinese too all around the world. We all have totally unrelated and unique cultural backgrounds. I'm sure my grandfather took a leap of faith when he came to Malaya with his father on a business trip and ended up staying here.

What if I would to live in Australia, have kids and have grandchildren? I understand that to achieve that I need to get married, seriously doubt that any woman would want to marry me. Whatever! Anyway, if I am lucky enough to have children, they might live their life as an Australian and by the time they grow up, they might not have any ties back to Malaysia. The stuff I see here is how ties are broken as if they have no idea how life is back in their homeland. A friend of my uncle came to Australia as a refugee with his family as the Vietnam war broke out. I'm sure his kids have no idea how Vietnam is like now. I don't blame them. It's life.

By the time of my grandchildren, they will most likely have no memories about Malaysia as if my family has never lived there. A few generations down, they might even thought their forefathers come directly from China. How scary is that? No memories of Nasi Lemak, no idea of Merdeka, no thought of bribing the policemen. The truth is, I have no control over them but seriously, I believe living in Malaysia has been a great 18 years of my life. Hypothetically speaking, if I would to migrate overseas, it would be pitiful that my future generation don't have the chance to have the childhood, teenage and school life that I had. It was indeed very colorful.

post - script : as the independence day draw closer, maybe I'm grateful being a Malaysian after all. are you?

Yours truly,

Ang Mo Kia

I don mind having extra enemies...

eh, ask u all la, isit good to be secretive?
I find it many ppl like to be tatway... that is freaking ASS HOLE SOHAI u know....

oni i can spam here, since my ori blog got ppl stalk one... U know those ass hole like to be treated tat one... they are like wearing a mask and treat u so good as u can nvr imagine... but at ur back they will backstab u one leh... really diao u know? Han Jun, sometimes I don mind having extra enemies, cz they are not my true frens, and cz at least I din feel like guilty treating other ppls like tat... u know ar? Since they redi know who is the culprit or watsoever, they still treated them like nothing happened, somore can chit chat so friendly like tat, acting in front of them and bla bla... i cant believe my own eyes seeing it like tat, cant believe my own ears hearing it over and over again...

wah diu.... wat the world is this oh? really full of cunning smiles and full of ass-hole-like shits.... diu i hate it man... really wanna fk 9 them sometimes... I don giv a damn he dulan me anot, but im sure he told his frens about this and they treated me so differently... they like to backstab ppl... but treat u so good in front of u... i oni can spam my feelings here, if i write it at my blog, he will start to say, pls be mature abit, if u say thing s like tat we will bla bla bla... pui...

even if he found out i wrote this, so wat? i don giv a damn on him... if u like to be secretive? fine, lets play it... somore say i childish... fk la... i oni straight forward, i wont hide things like tat... dono who is childish... backstab ppl like tat still wan claim ppl childish... fk off, loser!!! Ma Cao Hai, still wan talk crap.... i know wat adults are, they tend to claim they are always right even if they are obviously wrong... Adults are those who nvr thought of his bad things, but keep claiming himself right... this is the fact, this is their world... wtf... who think im right please leave ur comment here...

about our blog

hey guys since this is a shared blog, so pls include your name at the end of each post TQ. hope u all are fine. ~chang

2 interesting video to share XD

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E2L7inzoYPI&NR=1

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1hRRpl3_SaY&feature=related

女人的下半身和上半身

男人要走，是留不住的。
有些女人傻得用自己的生命去留住他，
有些女人却天真地用身体去留住他，
结果两种女人都失败。
爱情是由上半身开始的，然後是下半身
上半身和下半身契合，那是最完美的爱情。....
分手却是上半身的事。
女人以为用身体可以留住一个不爱她的男人，
她就未免太高估自己的下半身了。
男人爱一个女人的时候，希望得到她的下半身。
如果她只肯给他上半身，他也是愿意的。
有些男人可以长久地恋慕一个女人
他爱的是她的上半身、她的人品、她的智慧。
他就是喜欢看见她 ，跟她谈天说地。...
他喜欢她，他会控制自己的下半身
所以说，留住爱情的，是上半身。

给女孩们的忠告

1、不要在流眼泪的时候做任何决定，情绪负面的时候说话越少越好。
2、不要去反复思考同一个问题，不要把所有的感情都放在一个人身上，你还有父母，有朋友。
3、不要害怕做错什么，即使错了，也不必懊恼，人生就是对对错错，何况有许多事，回头看来，对错已经无所谓了。
4、有负面情绪是正常的，但是自己一定要知道，要明白这只是生活的一小部分，在其余时间里，要尽量的让情绪平稳起来。
5、那个人，突然不联系你了，很正常；那个人，突然又联系你了，也很正常，这什么也不说明。
6、如果不懂，就说出来，如果懂了，就别说，笑笑即可。
7、一切的烦恼都是自找，因此也只能自己解决，不要找朋友哭诉，找他们去打球。
8、说过的话一定要做到，即使是很蠢的话，再蠢也比言而无信好。
9、无论发生怎样的变故，不要打破生活原有的规律，要按时吃饭，按时睡觉。
10、不要去害怕做一件事，不要害怕触景伤情，不要害怕说错话，不要害怕想起过去，不要害怕面对未来。
11、无论是对是错，你需要有一个准则，你的行为应该遵循这个准则，并根据现实生活不断的修正。反反复复优柔寡断的人，是不可能讨人喜欢的.在对错之间徘徊的人，形象不如从错到对的人正面。
12、当他说：“让我们冷静一段时间好吗？”的时候，要冷静的说好，然后挂掉电话。不要哀求，他不是来征求你的意见的。
13、不要把心底的话全掏出来，这些是只属于你的财富。
14、不要和一个人和他议论同一个圈子里的人，不管你认为他有多么可靠。
15、当你不知道和他说什么的时候，那就什么也不要说，沉默有无限种含义。
16、不要追求什么结果，每个人结果都一样，就是死亡。
17、不要后悔，无论怎样都不要后悔，后悔的情绪比你所做错的事更加可怕，因为这会摧毁你的自信，自尊以及很有可能让你去做一件更错的事。
18、无论遇到什么事情，都要对自己说：这是正常的。而不要说：我怎么这么倒霉？或是：他怎么这样？那些遇到汶川地震，911或印尼海啸的人很多都没有机会抱怨了。比起他们，生活中的一些波折都是正常的，今天也许你的男朋友离你而去，你会觉得自己是世界上最惨的人，但是别忘了也许这世上同时有几十万个姑娘和你有着同样的遭遇，只是你不知道而已。
19、不要担心嫁不出去，更不要因为年纪大了草率结婚，担心嫁不出去总比担心老公出轨要离婚，小三抢财产要好.担心嫁不出去只是担心而已，心情好了还照样过原来的日子，老公真要离婚那才是真的麻烦。
20、一定要明白，自己所做的一切都是为了追寻一种状态，一种自我的满足感和幸福感。不要害怕什么，这世上可供害怕的事太多了，你是害怕不完的。有事情，就解决，不能解决，那就拉倒。
21、最后一条，女人想过得好一些，还是要走内在男人化，外在女人化的路。

An open letter to Chris.

Hey, mate. How is it going? Hope you're doing good. I wrote this open letter as I find it hard to get your attention on facebook, hard to get you to stay long enough to talk on msn and hard to get you during school days. I guess engineering is tough, right? Just for your information, I just got back from Tasmania. I visited my cousin over there. Very Awesome. Here are some pictures for you to show how much you missed. haha. Anyway, my idea is to lure you here with me. Australia is a very beautiful place. A picture tell a thousand words. Enjoy!

Taroona Shot Tower. They used to make bullets here.

The entrance of Shot Tower. It's kinda cold in Tassie.

Even I wore a scarf, apparently guys in Australia don't wear scarf, I'm the only one.

So gay but it's really cold.

Mt. Wellington. Notice the kids playing with snow?

Of course, it was freaking freezing all the time.
Ignore my cousin on the left, she's a bit of a retard

The view of Hobart from Mt. Wellington.

The sunset at the Tasman Peninsula. I bet you would love this.

I have more pictures on facebook. Tasmania is no doubt a peaceful, scenic and cold place. I bet you'll love it here. I hope to hear from you really soon. Take care. Have a good one. Cheerio.

Maybe your best damn course mate ever,
Ang Mo Kia.

永远的爱

和蓝分手了，蓝是个很好的女孩，很漂亮也很温柔，虽然很多朋友说我离开她很傻，可我还是放手了，虽然我很舍不的。
第一天， 她没有起床，把自己用被子捂的严严实实的，她宿舍的人都不敢去安慰她， 她一天都没有吃饭，连刷牙洗脸都没有，晚上睡觉的时候我听到她在被子里抽泣。
第二天， 今天她吃饭了，是她的宿舍同学强制性的让她吃的，她的眼眶红红的，我总 说她是个爱哭鬼，她每次都噘着小嘴说她不是。
第三天， 今天她穿的很妖艳，走进一家酒吧，喝了好多酒，用一种很诱惑的眼光环视 全场，好多人上来搭腔“小姐，你好漂亮啊”。她喝了很多，当一个年纪可以做她爸爸的男人对她说“小姐，我送你回家吧”的时候她把手中的酒全泼在他的脸上，那个该死的老头扬起他的手掌就要打下去的时候，小睦他们来了，救了蓝，这一切我都知道，我就在酒吧的一个角落里看着。
第四天， 今天她早早就起床了，忙忙碌碌一上午，然后把自己关在浴室里好久，当舍 友们踹门进去的时候都惊呼到：好干净啊。
第五天， 她开始学习了，其实她原来学习很好，我们开始后受我影响她的成绩也退步了，这也好，转移一下注意力，恢复的也快。
三个月后。她做了学生会主席，她越来越能干，也开朗了不少，马上她就要考研了。 一年后。。在她身边的男人很多，比我优秀的也很多，可她根本没在意过，不过她和凌很好，校园里传他们的关系很暧昧。她只是把他当哥哥，可是流言是挡不住的。
三年后。。她要结婚了，新郎是凌，她在写结婚请贴，一张，两张，三张，，，写到第十二张的时候她哭了，趴在桌上眼泪完全抑制不住，我上前一看，所有的喜贴新郎写的都是我的名字。 我也很想哭，可是鬼魂是不能哭的，我没有眼泪。
三年前，我横穿马路，遇上车祸，手里提着要给她庆祝生日的蛋糕。

如果我愛你

如果我愛你...而你正巧的也愛我.......
那.....你生病的時候..我會去照顧你..陪著你到好....
你騎車的時候..我會要你小心一點..還要你到的時候打個電話跟我說...
你忘了吃晚餐的時候..我會裝做很生氣..然後說'你這樣會讓我擔心耶!"
你頭髮亂了時候..我會笑笑的替你撥一撥..然後..手還留戀的在你髮上多待幾秒
你想哭..我會陪你掉淚..儘管前一刻我的心情其實是雀躍的..
你要笑..我會陪你笑出聲..不管我上一秒其實是沮喪的..
我在空閒的時候..會唸唸你的名字.想想你的聲音..
我在逛街的時候..會想到"啊!你正好缺了這個..."
我在發現了好東西的時候..一定馬上想到''一定要你來看看''..
我失眠了之後..聽到你也失了眠...會在心裡偷偷的傻笑...
我在熬夜的時候..接到你只為了說聲'不要太累.早點睡了..'的電話.會甜甜的笑著..而且乖乖的去睡...我在想著你的時候..知道你也在想著我....但是....
如果我愛你...而你不巧的不愛我.........那......
你生病的時候..我只會打通電話慰問你.不敢奢求待在你身邊...
你騎車的時候..我只會暗暗的在心中希望你安全...
你忘了吃晚餐..我只會笑笑的問'為什麼不吃阿?'...
你頭髮亂了..我只能輕輕的告訴你'頭髮亂了喔'....
你想哭...我只能在旁邊無奈的輕輕嘆氣著...
你想笑...我只能微微的對你笑著...
我在空閒的時候...還是會唸唸你的名字..想想你的聲音..
我在逛街的時候...會想到'是誰幫你買了這個了吧...'
我發現了好東西的時候...會無奈的想著'會是誰告訴你這個好消息呢'...
我失眠之後...會躲著不讓你看見我的黑眼圈...
我在熬夜的時候...不敢期待會有電話聲..響起來..
我在想著你的時候..會想到..這時的你..是想著誰呢?...

the legendary yet ugliest singer

man will always remember these two: the man who walked on the moon and the man who moon walked. Rest in Peace, Micheal Jackson.

regards,
chris.

Blindfolded and running from bullets in a mine field.

Drowning in a sea of misery,
I wished that I knew better.
It's known, human make mistakes,
mine is always letting people down.
The worst part about being upset is,
knowning happiness is just a toss away.
The morning apples that just riped,
is another moment I want to erase.
Oh, how much I wish I'm back home,
home to the people I know as you.

post - script :
To my family members, my relatives,
to my closest friends back in utar, like Lai27, Chris, SIM, Dr., Yigang,
it's time like this I just want to go to a place,
where I know you guys won't judge me.

Only God can judge me,
Ang mo kia.

hie everyone

erm yesterday i posted someting about the way we are treated in this country. After a while i had decided to deleate that post. This is because i think that we as a malaysians should think more mauredly and accept the fact that this things do happend all around the world and a simple spark of heatred will make it spread to more people in our multi race cociety. thus it will make heatrade and less peaceful.So thats it, bye bye ex post.

Here i want to share someting with u all. I JOINED THE KL MARATHON!!! SEE THIS

Moral studies in malaysia.

hanjun u lucky bastard dun have to study this SOHAI subject!!! hoho.. let me share something with u since i was not caught by ISA yet.. haha..

Diskriminasi ras ditakrifkan sebagai perbezaan layanan berdasarkan perbezaan ras atau kaum. Fenomena ini berlaku apabila sesebuah negara mempunyai rakyat pelbagai kaum, dan Malaysia merupakan sebuah negara yang terbaik untuk dijadikan contoh. Golongan minoriti di dalam negara berkenaan sentiasa berasa mereka didiskriminasikan dalam banyak perkara oleh golongan majoriti. Golongan minoriti berasa peluang dan hak yang sama tidak diberikan kepada mereka seperti yang diberikan kepada golongan majoriti. Contoh yang terbaik ialah orang Melayu merupakan rakyat bumiputera di Malaysia malakala kaum-kaum lain seperti orang Cina dan India sebagai rakyat bukan bumiputera tidak mempunyai hak bumiputera seperti mempunyai 7 % diskaun dalam pembelian tanah dan rumah. Ini telah menyebabkan golongan minoriti seperti orang Cina dan India di Malaysia tidak berpuas hati terhadap regulasi kerajaan Malaysia selama 52 tahun. Sejak perlantikan Datuk Seri Najib Razak sebagai Perdana Menteri yang baru di Malaysia, beliau mempunyai satu impian untuk melahirkan satu bangsa dan satu negara selaras dengan amalan konsep Satu Malaysia. Namun begitu, konsep Satu Malaysia ini hanyalah satu konsep yang hanya dikata-katakan di blog Satu Malaysia sahaja dan tiada sebarang tindakan yang dilaksanakan untuk merealisasikan konsep ini sehingga sekarang! Satu Malaysia, satu bangsa merupakan cakap angin sahaja! Sebagai orang Malaysia, kita mengalami satu pengalaman benar tentang diskriminasi ras. Apabila rakyat bumiputera meletakkan kereta di kawasan bergaris kuning yang berhampiran dengan masjid pada hari jumaat, kereta mereka tidak akan disaman. Kita hendak bertanya bahawa terdapatkah satu undang yang menerangkan bahawa meletakkan kereta di kawasan bergaris kuning pada hari jumaat tidak bersalah?

Diskriminasi agama berlaku apabila seseorang atau kumpulan yang menganuti agama tertentu tidak diberi peluang mengamalkan ajaran agama mereka. Keadaan ini biasanya berlaku kepada penganut agama yang menjadi minoriti di dalam sesebuah negara. Contohnya di England, terdapat orang Islam yang dibuang kerja kerana menunaikan sembahyang pada waktu malam atau memakai tudung kepala. Di Perancis, perempuan Islam tidak dibenarkan bersekolah jika mereka memakai tudung kepala.

Selain diskriminasi yang dilakukan terhadap orang Islam, pengikut agama lain tidak ketinggalan menerima nasib yang sama. Walaupun Malaysia ialah sebuah Negara yang berbilang kaum, namun terdapat beberapa contoh yang benar betul berlaku di Negara kita. Kebelakangan ini, isu-isu tentang perselisihan antara Kementerian Penerangan, Komunikasi & Kebudayaan dan Kementerian Kesihatan dalam penyakit Influenza H1N1 jenis A yang sentiasa dipaparkan di dada akhbar dan di kaca televisyen dan sering meniti bibir ke bibir. Kementerian Penerangan, Komunikasi & Kebudayaan menamakan penyakit Influenza H1N1 jenis A sebagai penyakit selesema babi ataupun selesema khinzir walaupun WHO telah menentukan nama penyakit tersebut sebagai penyakit Influenza H1N1 jenis A dan penyakit ini tidak berkaitan dengan memakan daging khinzir. Oleh kerana khinzir merupakan haiwan yang sensitif dalam Malaysia, oleh itu menamakan penyakit Influenza H1N1 jenis A sebagai penyakit selesema khinzir merupakan sebuah gerak-geri yang beransur diskriminasi agama. Ini telah menunjukkan bahawa orang Islam mempunyai diskriminasi ke atas orang Cina kerana mereka menganggap orang yang makan daging khinzir adalah berjangkit dengan penyakit tersebut walaupun itu bukan kebenarannya.

I respect the malays for eating HALAL and they didnt respect us,chinese and discriminate us for eating pork.. haiz..